Elderly financial abuse

ELderly financil abuse keeps getting a bigger issue.

As an elder, or more often as the child of an enderly parent or relative, please take a vary careful look at anything that's offered, foisted, pressed on you… 

We're seeing more and more scames being launched onto the elderly.

Please take a careful double look… examine, consider, and don't buy in right away!

See this site for more…

http://www.ctvnews.ca/5things/how-to-thwart-growing-threat-of-elderly-financial-abuse-1.3460984

A last wish: to die at home

Have you heard this from an aging parent? "It's a last wish: to die at home".

I've heard that from hundreds of families.

And it's not an unrealistic wish.

There is a certain comfort and dignity to being able to die in one's own bed, in one's own home. Clearly this is not an option for a parent whose been institutionalized in a hospital or nursing home. Howevever, it seems that dying at home with the appropriate care for someone who is sliding toward the end can be accommodated. 

Hospic-like arrangements can be provided in the home, and ideally as much of the broader family would be engaged in the process.

This also can allow time to share memories, and if possible photos.

It's worth exporing if the circumstances are right.

Family in need is family indeed: the sandwich generation

The sandwich generation has a challenge. Why?

Because many of us have it coming and going.


‘Coming’ is our now adult kids who rediscover home as a good, safe, and, to tell the whole truth, financially very convenient place to be for a while. It might be for lack of a job or a failed marriage or simply rents getting too high. But consider that ‘for a while’ can become pretty open ended.


‘Going’ is our now ever more elderly and frail parents, who brave on and still want to command our lives, but who, in fact, are in every more need of help and support. The occasional dollop of help has become the daily routine.


And we’re stuck in the middle, striving to balance both being good parents and good children and often rationalizing that we can handle push and shove at the same time without imploding or exploding. We’re the shoulder generation, carrying a lot on those shoulders.
Are you into this scene? Is coming and going becoming a real part of your real life? If it is, what are you doing about it? Why? And how? Because in your own self interest, you should.

 

Don’t let spring cleaning become spring falling for the elderly

It just happened to my wife, an avid early morning walker. She does everything ‘right’ in terms of the ‘right’ shoes, coat, scarf, hat—you name it –she does it. The only thing she does not do is make sure the weather is perfect and receptive to activities of middle, later age, and elderly individuals. 

Continue reading “Don’t let spring cleaning become spring falling for the elderly”

Living close to high-traffic roads raises dementia risk: study

People who live in close proximity to high-traffic roadways appear to have a higher risk of dementia than those who live farther away, say researchers, suggesting that air pollution from vehicles may be a factor in the development of the neurological disease. Read more here:

http://ctv.news/2vCUSzD

Our annual eldercare advice for the holidays

This seems to be a big favourite year over year:

Suggestions of how to bet support aging parents and loved ones through family events.

Please take a look, and share with your friends, too.

Here it is:  http://www.parentingyourparents.ca/plan-good-holida…derly-loved-ones/ ‎

Nursing home drama: wrong treatment

This is an email from a long time friend on the west coast. 

Her point is simple and poignent… a nursing home drama: wrong treatment.

Her challenge: how to help her failing fahter.

It's not pretty, and so many of us experience the same trauma. 

Please read on.

On Thursday, dad's geriatric psychiatrist contacted me to discuss his treatment. The facility is saying he is being aggressive, so they are looking at his meds to adjust. Less than a half hour later the doctor called me back asking if the facility had contacted me because they are indicating they will send him to emergency where he will essentially be sedated. The doctor doesn't agree with this and has him on the waiting list to get into the geriatric floor at the hospital. 

Dad is physically fine, he gets around and is busy. He tends to get into other people's rooms and moves everything around and tries to fix things. His eyesight is really bad, so he feels for things. One care aide at the home is calling this aggressive behaviour. He has had a couple of incidents, but they were because he was alone and could have been redirected, no one was hurt or even close to being hurt. Dad jokingly does a one two jab action, then laughs. It is a jest, not aggressive whatsoever. His main care aides say he is the least aggressive person, but busy and gets into things. The facility have told us we have to be there from the time he wakes until he goes to sleep or they will send him to emergency here he will be sedated and returned to the facility or he may not have anywhere to go. 

The home has a lack of staff and often there is often no LPN on his floor. If they are on breaks there is no one there. This is a dementia unit for high needs patients. They will move in temporary replacement staff that do not have dementia training, nor read the patients charts and make comments such as why are we even feeding these people.

They have lost his shoes, his dentures, his glasses, they don't shave him and I have to ask for him to be changed. They are supposed to contact us when incidents occur and they haven't.

It is appalling. I am putting in a formal complaint to the health authority, licensing board, and ministry. The disease is hard enough on its own without having to deal with the system. Not sure why I am sharing, except that I know you went through the disease part. This is not the norm as far as care, is it? I am working with the doctor and hopefully we can get him into a place that has adequate care. 

Maybe you need a follow up book on how to ensure your parent is being cared for?

Clearly, her father needs the right kind of care. 

He seems to need regular attention and care. And a way to vent his interets and energy.  It seems he's not violent or dangerous. But ongoing stimulation may be needed.

Bottom line: the system needs stronger checks and balances. It needs to be able to effectively understand and manage the needs to those who are suffering from various stages of dementia. 

 

End of life health care wishes: be precise!


The issue of medically assisted dying should be in your estate
planning in the event you can’t make decisions on your own, or that your aging loved ones can't! Michael Gordon has often wirtten ane spoken on this. Here is another piece to consider.


Some people leave this earth with a sense of humour. I think of
Canadian lawyer and successful businessman Charles Vance Miller, who
died in 1926 and held a contest in his last will and testament where a
portion of his estate would be left to the Toronto woman who, in the
10 years following his death, gave birth to the most children. It
became known as the “Great Stork Derby.” Turns out that four women
shared the bequest (each receiving the equivalent in today’s dollars
of $2.1-million), each giving birth to nine children in 10 years.


While dying with humour is not often talked about, the more serious
and controversial issue of “dying with dignity” has been hot in the
press. The whole issue of medically assisted death is one that many
would like to ignore. The fact is, however, the issue should work its
way into your estate planning, particularly in the event you can’t
make decisions on your own. It brings to mind the story of a family
and a court decision from just four years ago.

The story
Mrs. F was a widow who gradually developed dementia. She was visiting
Florida in 2012 when she apparently inhaled some food that required
emergency help. By the time help arrived, she had experienced brain
anoxia and didn’t recover significant consciousness. A feeding tube
was inserted at the hospital in Florida before she was transferred
back to Toronto to a hospital there.


Soon after she arrived in Toronto, her family produced a power of
attorney for personal care prepared 10 years earlier, that included
the following wording: “I hereby instruct that if there is no
reasonable expectation of my recovery from physical or mental
disability, I be allowed to die and not be kept alive by artificial or
heroic measures. I do, however, instruct that medication be mercifully
administered to me to alleviate suffering even though this may shorten
my remaining life.”

It went on to read: “I authorize and direct my
attorneys for personal care to make on my behalf all decisions with
respect to my personal care if I am mentally incapable of making such
decisions myself.” Her attorneys for personal care were her three
children.


Given the wording of the power of attorney, Mrs. F’s doctor, on behalf
of the hospital, requested that they allow her to die. The matter was
taken to the Consent and Capacity Board (CCB), an independent body in
Ontario created under the Health Care Consent Act. On June 14, 2012,
the CCB supported the doctor’s request to end Mrs. F’s life because
they took her words in the power of attorney for personal care to be
directive, and not just precatory. But her children wanted differently
and took the matter to court. (As an aside, I have a problem with
others even trying to force a decision like this without simply
acquiescing to the wishes of the substitute decision makers – the
children who held power of attorney in this case – but I digress.)

The decision
On April 3, 2013, the Ontario Superior Court sided with the children.


Witnesses came forward, including rabbis, attesting to Mrs. F’s
Orthodox Jewish faith and life practices. Removing the feeding tube
would have been contrary to the tenets of Judaism that they believe
would have been important to her and which she embodied in all aspects
of her life.


After examining all the evidence, the court found that Mrs. F likely
did not understand or appreciate the words “artificial and heroic
measures” in her power of attorney for personal care. She likely did
not understand all the implications of what she signed. Her life-long
faith was accepted as an important factor that was not sufficiently
taken into account by the CCB. There was no evidence that she
requested an end-of-life clause (her lawyer had no notes of specific
discussions and simply discussed general issues related to powers of
attorney).

The learning
The issue of medically assisted dying should be in your estate
planning in the event you can’t make decisions on your own
 


Tim Cestnick, FCPA, FCA,
CPA(IL), CFP, TEP, is an author and founder of WaterStreet Family
Offices.

© Copyright The Globe and Mail Inc. All Rights Reserved

Informal caregivers to the aging is a huge challenge

This is an article from the Globe & Mail, Canada's national newspaper, that appeared on Labour Day, 2014. I just found it filed among old emails. It was meant to be used long ago, but I forgot about it. However, MIchael and I believe this is a very important concept that is worth reading today, just as much as two years ago. 

Fact is, informal caregivers to the aging is a huge challenge. It's a daily growing challenge across Canada, North Americal and around the world.


Labour Day typically comes with a barrage of reports on the status of
work in Canada. How many Canadians are employed and how many are
looking for work. What they are paid and how these earnings compare to
last year. Whether the numbers are better or worse than our American
counterparts.
Of course, this is crucial information and we need it to understand
both current and future prospects for Canadian workers. But there is
another group of essential workers about whom little will have been
written.
These are the 8.1 million informal caregivers who provide some form of
care to elderly parents or individuals with severe and prolonged
disabilities. Statistics Canada reported that in 2012, 28 per cent of
Canadians aged 15 and older cared for a family member or friend with a
long-term health condition, disability or aging needs.
Age-related needs topped the list, with 28 per cent of caregivers
providing assistance to elderly parents. Cancer was next at 11 per
cent, followed by cardiovascular disease at 9 per cent and mental
illness at 7 per cent.
While informal caregivers deliver essential services, they perform
these tasks at no pay. They basically make up a vast but largely
unrecognized and hidden work force in the country.
In fact, unpaid caregivers provide more than 80 per cent of care
required by individuals with long-term conditions. These informal
workers contribute an estimated $5-billion of unpaid labour a year to
the health-care system. One report pegged this figure at closer to an
annual $25-billion if all the wide-ranging tasks performed by
caregivers are included in the calculation.
Whether their economic value is $5-billion or $25-billion is largely
irrelevant in the grand scheme. Caregiver contributions, both
individually and collectively, are incalculable and invaluable because
they add profoundly to the quality of life of the individuals for whom
care is provided.
But the fact that caregivers are unpaid has meant that both their
contributions and their concerns have gone ignored. Their
“invisibility” also results from women still providing the bulk of
unpaid care. They are simply expected to pick up these
responsibilities as part of the caregiving role women typically assume
in society.
In a recent keynote address, a financial planning guru was asked by a
retiring audience member about the best steps to take in order to
secure one’s future. His answer: “Get yourself a daughter.”
The reply was only partly in jest. Caregiving used to be the exclusive
domain of women. But this societal expectation is changing,
fortunately. Data from Statistics Canada’s 2012 General Social Survey
showed that women now account for a slight majority of caregivers, at
54 per cent.
The survey also found that caregiving responsibilities typically fall
to those ages 45 to 64, with 44 per cent of caregivers in this
category. Most informal caregivers of this age also likely participate
in the paid labour market – unless they have to withdraw because of
their caregiving demands.
The demographics mean that employers must come to terms with
caregiving realities, which only will grow with Canada’s aging
population. Businesses will have to allow more time and work
flexibility. This need is particularly true for the care of persons
with episodic conditions, who have remissions with periods of good
functioning and recurrences that may require intensive assistance −
all unpredictable.
For their part, governments can provide more assistance with expensive
health-related costs. They can also modify income security policies to
allow some time off for caregiving. Employment insurance has taken
baby steps in this regard but needs a more generous approach.
Neither should workers, who must take some time for caregiving, be
penalized in their pension vesting. Several countries, including
Australia and Britain, have special pensions intended specifically for
caregivers. Others make pension contributions on behalf of caregivers
to avoid later penalty for lost employment time during working years.
No individual should be driven into poverty, either in present or
future, because of caregiving responsibilities.
On Labour Day, we need to pay attention to this huge group of
essential workers: the millions of informal caregivers who show up
nowhere in the employment numbers, but figure so prominently in real
life.