Elderly financial abuse

ELderly financil abuse keeps getting a bigger issue.

As an elder, or more often as the child of an enderly parent or relative, please take a vary careful look at anything that's offered, foisted, pressed on you… 

We're seeing more and more scames being launched onto the elderly.

Please take a careful double look… examine, consider, and don't buy in right away!

See this site for more…

http://www.ctvnews.ca/5things/how-to-thwart-growing-threat-of-elderly-financial-abuse-1.3460984

Care costs for aging parents higher

 

A recent CIBC study reported by CTV news reveals that the care costs for aging parents are ever higher and higher.

It notes that there are the direct costs of caring for aging parents, and then the indirect costs, like lost worktime.

Read the story here: www.ctvnews.ca/business/caring-for-aging-parents-costs-canadians-33b-a-year-survey-1.3402778

A last wish: to die at home

Have you heard this from an aging parent? "It's a last wish: to die at home".

I've heard that from hundreds of families.

And it's not an unrealistic wish.

There is a certain comfort and dignity to being able to die in one's own bed, in one's own home. Clearly this is not an option for a parent whose been institutionalized in a hospital or nursing home. Howevever, it seems that dying at home with the appropriate care for someone who is sliding toward the end can be accommodated. 

Hospic-like arrangements can be provided in the home, and ideally as much of the broader family would be engaged in the process.

This also can allow time to share memories, and if possible photos.

It's worth exporing if the circumstances are right.

Family in need is family indeed: the sandwich generation

The sandwich generation has a challenge. Why?

Because many of us have it coming and going.


‘Coming’ is our now adult kids who rediscover home as a good, safe, and, to tell the whole truth, financially very convenient place to be for a while. It might be for lack of a job or a failed marriage or simply rents getting too high. But consider that ‘for a while’ can become pretty open ended.


‘Going’ is our now ever more elderly and frail parents, who brave on and still want to command our lives, but who, in fact, are in every more need of help and support. The occasional dollop of help has become the daily routine.


And we’re stuck in the middle, striving to balance both being good parents and good children and often rationalizing that we can handle push and shove at the same time without imploding or exploding. We’re the shoulder generation, carrying a lot on those shoulders.
Are you into this scene? Is coming and going becoming a real part of your real life? If it is, what are you doing about it? Why? And how? Because in your own self interest, you should.

 

A housing crisis for seniors

According to this informative article that appeared in the New York times, we are into a housing crisis for seniors. This should not be a suprise to any of us who have or will confront the challenge of finding quality, affordable housing for our elderly parents when they need it.

Read it here:  https://nyti.ms/2jBSNHu

 

 

Don’t let spring cleaning become spring falling for the elderly

It just happened to my wife, an avid early morning walker. She does everything ‘right’ in terms of the ‘right’ shoes, coat, scarf, hat—you name it –she does it. The only thing she does not do is make sure the weather is perfect and receptive to activities of middle, later age, and elderly individuals. 

Continue reading “Don’t let spring cleaning become spring falling for the elderly”

Falling down: Accept your fate and roll with it

Falling down: Accept your fate and roll with it is a very timely and helpful piece that appeared in
The Globe and Mail Metro (Ontario Edition) on January 26, written by KATE MURPHY
KATHY OSBORN of the New York Times. It's a good 'heads up' for aging boomers and our elderly parents and other loved ones.


Rare is the individual who hasn’t tripped over a pet or uneven pavement, tumbled off a bike, slipped on ice or maybe wiped out skiing or skating.


Some get injured while others go unhurt – often claiming it’s because they knew how to fall.

Continue reading “Falling down: Accept your fate and roll with it”

Our annual eldercare advice for the holidays

This seems to be a big favourite year over year:

Suggestions of how to bet support aging parents and loved ones through family events.

Please take a look, and share with your friends, too.

Here it is:  http://www.parentingyourparents.ca/plan-good-holida…derly-loved-ones/ ‎

Caring for a parent afflicted with Alzheimers

Caring for a parent afflicated with Alzheimers is challenging.

Listen here https://soundcloud.com/680cjob/parenting-our-parents​ as Dr. Michael Gordan discusses key considerations in a CJOB 680 interivew with host Jeff Currier in Winnipeg.

Nursing home drama: wrong treatment

This is an email from a long time friend on the west coast. 

Her point is simple and poignent… a nursing home drama: wrong treatment.

Her challenge: how to help her failing fahter.

It's not pretty, and so many of us experience the same trauma. 

Please read on.

On Thursday, dad's geriatric psychiatrist contacted me to discuss his treatment. The facility is saying he is being aggressive, so they are looking at his meds to adjust. Less than a half hour later the doctor called me back asking if the facility had contacted me because they are indicating they will send him to emergency where he will essentially be sedated. The doctor doesn't agree with this and has him on the waiting list to get into the geriatric floor at the hospital. 

Dad is physically fine, he gets around and is busy. He tends to get into other people's rooms and moves everything around and tries to fix things. His eyesight is really bad, so he feels for things. One care aide at the home is calling this aggressive behaviour. He has had a couple of incidents, but they were because he was alone and could have been redirected, no one was hurt or even close to being hurt. Dad jokingly does a one two jab action, then laughs. It is a jest, not aggressive whatsoever. His main care aides say he is the least aggressive person, but busy and gets into things. The facility have told us we have to be there from the time he wakes until he goes to sleep or they will send him to emergency here he will be sedated and returned to the facility or he may not have anywhere to go. 

The home has a lack of staff and often there is often no LPN on his floor. If they are on breaks there is no one there. This is a dementia unit for high needs patients. They will move in temporary replacement staff that do not have dementia training, nor read the patients charts and make comments such as why are we even feeding these people.

They have lost his shoes, his dentures, his glasses, they don't shave him and I have to ask for him to be changed. They are supposed to contact us when incidents occur and they haven't.

It is appalling. I am putting in a formal complaint to the health authority, licensing board, and ministry. The disease is hard enough on its own without having to deal with the system. Not sure why I am sharing, except that I know you went through the disease part. This is not the norm as far as care, is it? I am working with the doctor and hopefully we can get him into a place that has adequate care. 

Maybe you need a follow up book on how to ensure your parent is being cared for?

Clearly, her father needs the right kind of care. 

He seems to need regular attention and care. And a way to vent his interets and energy.  It seems he's not violent or dangerous. But ongoing stimulation may be needed.

Bottom line: the system needs stronger checks and balances. It needs to be able to effectively understand and manage the needs to those who are suffering from various stages of dementia.